Rule of Three

Want to drive yourself, and everyone around you, completely insane? Start planning a wedding. Nothing brings out nuttiness like satin and swiss meringue. I was reminded of this recently when my daughter asked to see the pictures of my wedding. Once I found the wedding album I started showing her the pictures. After establishing that she was not there, we looked at “Bride Mommy” and “Groom Daddy”. After repeatedly asking when we were married, I settled on the picture of the kiss at the end of the ceremony. However, my daughter believes it’s when there’s cake. Priorities.

Even thought I got married *cough* number of years ago, I still have relatives and friends come up to me and mention that it was one of the best weddings they’ve ever been too. Some have said it was even better than their own wedding. Why was our wedding so memorable? Aside from an awesome couple, my husband and I both were relaxed and were there to enjoy ourselves. If you can do that, your guests will almost always have a good time as well.

During the planning of the wedding, we received so much advice and were told that certain things were going to be done a certain way, that it made my head spin. I decided to sit down with my husband and we came up with three things we were going to have be non-negotiable with our parents, grandparents, etc. Everything else we were willing to bend on, which made the entire process more about finding agreement than “winning” each item. For us the three items were; location, great flowers, and fun photographs. And we got each of these things. This allowed other people have their say on certain things that weren’t as important to us and allow them to feel that they were heard. Examples include Italian cookies from a Providence bakery that needed to be part of dessert, my father getting to wear black-tie, and my mother picking the favors.

As I’ve watched friends and family get married since then, I’ve seen brides do it all sorts of different ways. But the brides who did not insist on getting their way on every little thing are always the ones that look the happiest. After all, you want to remember and enjoy your spouse and the friends and family, not be thinking about if the napkins were folded the way you wanted.

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